suityourself: August 2007

i had actually told myself that i dont wish to blog in text as to how i feel or about things that have been going on/happening. but things have been hard, really hard. and i seriously cant think of anything that can help me feel better besides draining it away here. which i think more or less helps a little. neither is there really anyone whom i really want to mention these things to even though i know that there are people out there who are genuinely concerned about me. i really dont know what to do. i've been trying my best. wasnt it said that things will only get easier when time passes by, but why does it seem to get harder and harder day by day. even times when im outside, i just feel like getting away & breaking down. i tried to be as optimistic as possible but nevertheless, it still gets to me. & the things just keep adding on by being down on luck. & there are times i've really feel like giving up, on everything, & on myself. this time round, i really feel at a loss of what to do. even someone whom ive met for only one time could interpret what i was thinking. i didnt expect things to be this way but it just seems so clear and it'll only get worse & i know i'll only feel much worse in time to come. but what can i do? theres almost nothing i can do. yesterday while walking to the canal with ruikiat, i told him i feel that everything just seems so wrong. i seem to be at the wrong place. i can't deny i'm afraid but at the same time i don't want to be overdependant. i just feel like taking a break. and to add on, i think my poly life sucks. sigh, i dont wish to talk about all these actually, becos i actually had the thought if i didnt mention, perhaps it would go away. but time has proven, noo.

jesus, pls help me.
sy was here.

pls dont leave any comments or ask me anything about this post. thanks.